Friday, November 24, 2006

Black Friday = Cleaning The House

It's Black Friday, and no, the 'chick is not shopping. Shopping on the day after Thanksgiving is NOT a tradition in the Roadtrip household.

The crowds and the lines and the frenzy stress the 'chick out & she prefers to stay as far away as possible. And, payday is still far off in the future of next week, so even if she wanted to join in - it would be as a spectator, not a participant.

Most of the holiday shopping will be done online - the 'chick is so thankful that there is an option for folks like her that detest the crowds and 'Jingle Bells' being blasted over the intercom.

So now that you know what she WON'T be doing - what will she be doing?


The days of having a whole day to be able to stay home and clean are few and far between in the land o' Roadchick. Funny how boyfriends and kiddos will do that. Someone is always wanting to go somewhere & do something and to be honest, the 'chick is not all that eager to leave Redneck sitting on the couch while she excavates her closet, chases down dust-goblins (they're much too big to be bunnies anymore), or cleans ceiling fans. Also, she's maybe a little bit ashamed for him to see that while her house looks pretty clean, when you get right down into it - lawd, it's not.

Now - please - don't be calling the health department. She is NOT one of those folks that you see on the news from time to time with stacks of newspapers lining the hallways or the world's largest collection of dryer lint that she was going to use to make Halloween costumes. It's just the normal yuck of living that accumulates when you don't have Alice the housekeeper living in or June Cleaver in the house.

But, the 'chick has a cleaning problem. Let's use yesterday as an example.

Yesterday morning, the 'chick was cleaning up the kitchen. (The kitchen & bathrooms are the two areas that are NOT allowed to sink into squalor at Chez Roadtrip.) The dishwasher was unloaded, dishes put away, and more dirty dishes loaded in. Then the 'chick remembered that she really needed to clean out the fridge and stick those dirty dishes in the dishwasher. So, she did that. And then it seemed like it would be a good idea to wipe down all the shelves in the fridge since it was so empty. So, she did that. And THEN she looked down at the grate thing at the bottom that covers the exhaust/drip pan area & it was a little dusty so it seemed like a good idea to pull it off & wash it since there was already a sinkful of soapy water. And then...well...ewww! Have y'all ever LOOKED under there? Lawd.

There are no coils on the back of the 'chick's fridge. It never occured to her to wonder where they were. Maybe just covered over or something. Yeah.

The vacuum was promptly fetched, a long-handled, plastic bristled paintbrush was retrieved, and a flashlight was located. And the cleaning commenced.

This is what happens nearly every time when the 'chick is cleaning. She starts out to do one simple, little chore and winds up taking the stove apart and cleaning the oven. Moving the TV stand to vacuum behind it is a certain guarantee that the 'chick will be distracted for ages, untangling the 28 millions cords and connectors back there, and dusting each one. Putting movies away will send the 'chick into a treasure hunt for missing discs...and then into the CD collection to re-organize that...

It's a problem.

The 'chick's big project today is to clean her room. (And catch up on laundry.) This is the first step in a larger project of turning her bonus room into a "studio" of sorts where she will keep all her knitting junk, her art supplies, her drawing table, her, most people would say that really, she ought to start in the bonus room, and get it ready to accept all the scattered stuff from the rest of the house. True. But - the 'chick's bedroom is visible and the bonus room is upstairs. And if she's in a "clean" environment, then she is more motivated to get it in gear with the other stuff that needs to be done. Besides, the carpet in the bonus room needs to be cleaned since Rockboy had taken over that room for awhile and he is not known for his tidy habits. Actually, he's a slob. Roadchick suspects this is a defect that was passed down from his father since she is nowhere NEAR that messy.

So, while y'all are fighting the crowds at the mall, the 'chick will be fighting her way to cleaning nirvana - if she doesn't get sidetracked and decide to re-grout the tile in the bathroom first.


tinker said...

If only I had the 'chick's energy level. Unfortunately, I'm still in a L-tryptophan induced stupor. So not only am I not shopping, I'm not doing much of anything else at the moment either.
However, after reading this, now I'm wondering what the science experiments in the fridge and the dust-gargoyles under it, are up to - so I may drag myself into the kitchen with sponge in hand soon. Well, just as soon as I can button my jeans again.

Kim G. said...

Gracious - I'm thankful that the chick's journey into inspired cleanliness can only last until tonight and then she will be freed from the black hole of cleaning that has sucked her into its evil innards of doom.

Michael Thomas said...

Good Post, Dudette!