Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Criminal Mischief

So, the Outlaws have been visiting. The weekend that they arrived was yet another weekend with temperatures over 100 degrees so that pretty much ruled out any sort of outdoor activity.

After some thought, it occured to the 'chick that it had been years since the clan had paid a visit to Opryland Hotel.

Opryland Hotel is the best at bringing the outdoors indoors and air-conditioning it. There are gardens and fountains and trees and even a river that has a boat ride. Almost like the Bellagio in Las Vegas. Except there are no slot machines.

So anyway, the Roadie crew wandered through the gardens and watched the Dancing Waters and poked around in gift shops ($2.50 for a bottle of Coke! $8.50 for a pack of cigarettes!) and took pictures and generally acted like they didn't get out much.

They almost made it out safely. Almost. But then, they looked down one level and saw this:

Well, no trip to the big city is complete without a little electronic amusement. Right? Into the arcade they went.

Right by the door, there was a machine that was similar to a crane game, where you have to grab the prize and manuever it to the chute in order to win the prize. This game had a spinning disk with a round dish on it and in the dish was a key. The key unlocked the "prize box" on top of the machine and the "prize box" contained one of those handheld Playstation video game thingees. (Wow, the 'chick can rock that technical language. Scary, isn't it?) In order to get the dish with the key, you had to get a mechanical arm to sliiiiiiide it over to your personal prize chute and knock it in.

Not as easy as it sounds.

So, they played that for awhile. A long while. Almost long enough to take the money invested in trying to win the game and just go buy the prize instead.

Then it happened.

Someone, who shall remain nameless, wondered out loud what would happen if the machine were to say . . . tilt and just slide the dish over.

Now, realize that this game machine weighed several hundred pounds so the efforts of a few people, who shall remain nameless, were needed for this experiment.

The results are as follows:

A LOUD alarm and bell (and possibly a flashing light) went off and the little (hidden) doors over the chutes slid closed.

Everyone in the arcade turned to look to see what was going on.

The scientific team conducting the experiment promptly set the machine back down again.

The entire Roadie crew e a s e d casually toward the door of the arcade, looking innocent.

The entire Roadie crew practiced their speed-walking skills to the nearest outside exit which was conveniently also the same door that they had entered through so getaway cars were very close at hand.

No one was arrested, but it's entirely possible that Opryland has face-recognition security software and the Roadie crew has been tagged for immediate ejection should they ever darken the doors again.

They don't call it NashVegas for nothing.


heather said...

you make me laugh! i can see it perfectly, we may have relatives in common. lol

btw, i think you ment a wii, but being the techno idiot i am, i'm not postitive. ;-)

Roadchick said...

Heather~ Nope, the 'chick knows what a Wii is - it was a handheld Playstation. Having herds of boys around is a good way to stay reasonably well-informed on video games.

Susan said...

Let's say..possibly...there could be a machine similar to this in Gatelinburg. Also, let's say that it would probably make the same noise with much less movement such as three people just happening to fall against it at the same time..ya know..just leaning back to have a rest..

Roadchick said...

Susan~ um, yeah . . .the Crew was . . .uh . . .stretching. Yeah, that's it!

Pacian said...

I'm here to collect the bounty on a voluptuous cowgirl by the name of Chick, first name Road. Any ideas where I should start?

heather said...

oh, you mean like one of those gameboy things?

bellamoden said...

Omg that was too funny! I'm glad you posted this uh.... fictional account. Yeah, that's it.

Kim G. said...

Man - how are we supposed to experience the virtues of racking guilt and humble repentance if the electronic entertainment industry won't even let us cheat?

Seriously - I love the OL Hotel. My aunt took us there once when we were visiting and we saw Reba being interviewed in the radio station there. Loved the atrium - very purty!

mist1 said...

I tried to elope there once but, the pain pills and liquor make my memories of it so hazy. I wonder what his name was.

I hope we're not still married.