Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Stupid Cupid


It has been pointed out by Liz that I have not posted in two weeks. She's right. My life has been a heady whirl of work, laundry, dishes, driving, more laundry, more dishes, more driving, and more work. Very little knitting of the sock. Try not to be jealous.

Valentine's Day came and went while I was leaving the blog shamefully neglected.

I've found it's a lot easier to be all laid back and nonchalant about Valentine's Day when you're in a relationship.

I did my Valentine's Day gift shopping for Redneck on Feb. 13. Redneck did his Valentine's Day shopping for me on Feb. 14. In the afternoon. With Skaterboy.

I like to put some thought into the cards that I choose for people and I tend to buy the cards early so there will be a good selection. I had Redneck's card not too long after Christmas.

Redneck, on the other hand, also bought my card on Feb. 14.

When he got back to house on the Day O' Love, he sat out in the driveway, in the car, for about 10 minutes, signing the card and stuffing everything into a gift bag with wadded up tissue paper.

So, it's gift time.

I'm weird about opening gifts. And I'm definitely weird about opening Valentine's Day gifts with an audience.

Skaterboy was not having any of that mushy crap of Redneck and I opening gifts alone together later. There were presents. They have to be opened NOW.

Redneck opened and read his card with Skaterboy standing right next to him, reading along. Redneck opened his gift bag with Skaterboy almost snorting the tissue paper because he was so close. I was thankful that I didn't buy the "little-bit-risque" gift that I was considering in addition to the main gift of expensive cologne. Redneck might have been having that birds & bees talk sooner than he was planning.

Now all the attention was on me. (Did I mention that I hate that and I'm really weird about it?)

I opened the gift first since the card was stuffed at the bottom of the bag. Lindor truffles and diamond hoop earrings. Very nice.

I dug the card out from under wadded up tissue paper and opened it. It was like being in third grade all over again.

Because there, smiling up at me, wearing a pink and purple tutu, was a chimpanzee, dressed up like Cupid, holding a bow and arrow. The inside said: From your favorite pain in the butt.

I don't know that I've ever gotten a more romantic card in my life. Skaterboy then proudly announced that everything in my present had come from Walmart. Uh, a little too much information there, kid. Hush up. Because now I'm thinking that the receipt for the earrings and the card would also show a case of motor oil, some athletic socks, and maybe a bottle of Advil.

Last weekend, Redneck and I were over at my brother's house and somehow Valentine's Day came up. I said that I had gotten diamond earrings and described the card, and then said: "But I guess Skaterboy picked out the card."

Redneck, bless him, does not know how to quit when he's ahead.

"No, he picked out the earrings. I picked out the card."

8 comments:

"Sunshine" said...

Too funny! You picked the perfect place to end the story. Hope you're able to knit on that sock soon. I'm a little scared of knitting in the round--scared of multiple knitting needles and RE: socks, scared of figuring out how to make the heel. I'm a newbie at the knitting thing.

Roadchick said...

Sunshine~ After that, there was no place else to go. And, if you can read directions, you can knit a sock heel - it's easier than it looks.

heather said...

so close yet so far away.
at least redneck paid for the earrings. lol

Roadchick said...

Heather~ Thank God we're in the South. "Bless him" covers so much...

Susan said...

Bless his heart. lol

Roadchick said...

Susan~ Exactly.

Autrice DelDrago: said...

ROFLMAO

Marguerite said...

I read this story when you first posted, but I am just now getting around to commenting. This story was hilarious!!! I agree with Sunshine--the ending was perfect.