Thursday, August 03, 2006

hot, Hot, HOT!

Y'all, can Roadchick vent? Just for a little minute? Because, Roadchick has had just about all she is going to stand.

What has got the 'chick's panties in a wad? There are numerous, numerous things.

You want more details? Roadchick will be happy to oblige.

Y'all - it's HOT.
Screeching, roasting, brain-meltingly HOT.
The 'chick does not do extremes of temperature well.
So, because the heat makes her unbelievably cranky...

The A/C in Roadchick's car is not working. As in: non-operational. As in: ain't workin.

Because, apparently, A/C isn't supposed to work when it's this hot.

And because it's scorching hot and the A/C isn't working, Roadchick was volunteered to drive about 50 miles (in THIS heat!) to a meeting for work. And expected to look polished and presentable when she arrived. And to conduct herself like the professional that she has fooled her bosses into thinking she is. And remain coherent and somewhat intelligent (no - do NOT go there) and present plans and offer suggestions and formalize agreements.

Now, y'all know that Roadchick was scheming on how to arrive and not look like she had been clobbered with a sweat-bomb. So, a skirt. Hiked up to hooker length in the car for maximum coolness. The truck drivers LOVED this. Roadchick knows. She has never received so many horn-honkings or thumbs ups in her life.

She survived the meeting. Her notes are garbled and sweaty, but with today's forensic technology, she should be able to decipher them. (She should be deciphering them now, but, ~whine~, she's hot and doesn't want to.)

She returned to her office in lovely NashVegas to be greeted with the announcement that the building's A/C is not working. Well, it's kind of working, but not really. So they're SHUTTING IT OFF. People, this is absolutely NOT allowed. It's 98 kajillion degrees outside.

Once again, Roadchick is starting to take this personally. Apparently A/C outages are following Roadchick like the plague. "Don't let her come over - your A/C will mysteriously stop working!"

Oh, and the plan? From the meeting that Roadchick just went to? That plan? The one that Roadchick thought was due on September 1? Wrong.


In related chaos-driven news, Roadchick has to go to her mother's house on the way home from work today. There is a letter that needs to be typed and Roadchick is expected to stop (in THIS heat!), make polite conversation, fend off offerings of items that her mother no longer wants (No, Mom, really, Roadchick does not need ceramic ducks. But thank you.), be instructed on how to properly and correctly type a letter (as if Roadchick doesn't type all day long, for MONEY), and finally escape, feeling as though the hounds of hell are on her heels.

And then return the next day, typed letter in hand with 7 copies, all properly addressed. (In THIS heat.)


Roadchick is losing her patience, not that she had much to begin with. She is beginning to dream, longingly, of the lovely mental hospital tucked into a bend of the river in Chattanooga. Because, you see, Patient Reader, she has a feeling that their A/C is working and if it isn't? There's plenty of Thorazine to go around so you won't even care.


Kim G. said...

My AC quit working when I was 9 month's pregnant with my daughter about this time of year. My solution, stop at 7-11's and buy a large slurpee to hold between my knees while driving. It worked!

Hope you get some relief from the heat soon - hang in there!