Thursday, August 10, 2006


Lately, just lately, Roadchick has been overhearing conversations. This is not something she set out to do, it's just something that's happened. Not to say that she didn't listen in once the overhearing started of course...just that she was not intentionally eavesdropping. Not droppin' no eaves on purpose.

Y'all - please - if it's not something you'd tell your mama, don't tell it in the line at Kroger. Please. Please. And if it is something you'd tell your mama but it involves bodily fluids of any sort - please, don't tell it in the line at Kroger.

Oh, and by the way? That cell phone that you're talking on? We can still hear YOUR end of the conversation. Just a little heads up for ya.

The 'chick is a little bit cranky today and she's not exactly sure why but she suspects that it has something to do with being on the receiving end of TOO MUCH INFORMATION.

Y'all know what TMI is, don't you? TMI is when you go into a little too much detail about any given subject although it's usually perpetrated in conversations related to sex, illness, or bodily functions.

It's telling someone that you don't know that well exactly what it was like having sex with your ex-wife. It's being privy to all the gory details of someone's recent bout with an intestinal virus. It's the auditory equivalent of sneezing on someone's sandwich and not even apologizing.

The biggest problem that the 'chick is having with TMI is that once she's been given the information SHE CAN'T GET IT OUT OF HER HEAD. Last night, the 'chick was chatting on the phone to one of the boys - just a friendship boy - and he felt it necessary to give the full details on his sex life with his ex-wife. Roadchick feels as though she has spiders walking around in her head now. It was WAY more than she ever wanted to know - ever. She is not exactly sure how she is supposed to face him now. It makes her squirmy. Eww.

It's the flashback, people! Roadchick is going about her day, happily, doing this and doing that and WHAM!...there it is again. How to stop the flashback???

It's like getting a song stuck in your head - for some reason, the main offender in this category for Roadchick is Uncle John's Band, either the Grateful Dead version or the Jimmy Buffet version - it does not matter. (Oh great, now that is rattling around too, like some freaky porn soundtrack - not pretty, y'all, not a BIT pretty.)

It's almost time for lunch in Roadchick's world - she may have to drink her lunch today. Maybe that will erase the memory.

(Note to all: No, Roadchick does NOT drink at lunch although the way the day is working out, she is beginning to wish she did.)


Jennifer said...